Weighty Matters

When working on a Happiness Project, you are encouraged to look at what makes you feel good, what makes you feel bad, what doesn’t feel right about your life, and what provides you with growth.

The thing in my life that hits all of those marks is my weight.

I weight less in my forties than I did in high school, and I’m still heavy.  Right now, I’m just in the obese category.  I don’t think I’ve ever been a healthy weight.

Maybe in kindergarten.

Infancy…

But by the third grade, I knew I was fat.

In 2007 I made the decision to pursue bariatric surgery.  I had the surgery in 2008 and lost 130 lbs.  Over the last couple of years I’ve gained about 15 lbs. back.  One of my goals for 2013 is not only to lose those 15 lbs. that I’ve gained, but also to make a push toward a health Body Mass Index, which I’ve never achieved.

I’ve started 2013 at 184.4 lbs.  I’d like to end the year 40-50 lbs. lighter.  On Thursdays, I’ll focus on my progress.

Advertisements

Jesus Gave Me a Smackdown

*Sigh*

It’s very easy to delude yourself, I think.  You go by, day-to-day, and you stop paying attention to the details.

Sure, that skirt seems a little tight.

Yeah, I probably shouldn’t have had those chips.

I’ll go to the gym tomorrow.

It’s only a couple of pounds…

I weigh myself almost every day so I’m pretty aware of the ups and downs.  Generally, I don’t get too excited by it.  I know what a salty dinner does to me, or how a day light on fluids will show up at the scale.  I know that an unusually heavy workout will cause an uptick for a couple of days.

I know that generally I’ve had more ups than downs recently.  I didn’t worry much because I knew it was still in the area where I had control.  I know that if I buckle down for a week, it would be fairly simple to get back to where I’m comfortable.

But the scale isn’t the whole story.

And I’ve let it be.

I’ve got a business trip coming up and I have to do a number of presentations.  The presentations mean I’ve got to drag out the suit.  I put one on, and it was tight.  I could zip and everything, but it was uncomfortable.  So I pulled out a different one.  It, too, was tight.  I felt like a sausage!  No way I could present all day in those pants.

I ended up pulling a pile of pants out of the closet, searching for a pair that wouldn’t bust at the seams.  It was disconcerting.  I bought several new suits this spring, and I know I didn’t buy anything that didn’t fit well in the store.

So this morning, I dug out the book where I used to record my measurements with religious fervor.  I hadn’t made notes since April of 2011.  I pulled out the tape measure, and got ready for dose of truth.  Since that last record, my weight was up seven pounds.  Not great, not horrible.  When focused, I can drop that pretty quickly.  My measurements, though, were up across the board.

By a lot.

When all was said and done, I was up 8.75 inches!

Inches aren’t as easy to fudge as pounds.  And when I went back further I realized that I’d picked up about 15 inches since my lowest weight.

I think that I’ve given myself too much credit lately.  I’ve started taking swimming lessons.  I’ve done a 5K this summer.  Everything HAD to be rosy!  Besides, I used to weigh 300 lbs.!  Look how much I’ve kept off!  For four years and counting!

Well, now I’ve got my wake up call.  So much for skipping the weight training and blowing off cardio several days a week.  I’ve got to do better.

Here’s the progress on the 41 Pounds Project:

  • July 1 – 183 lbs.
  • July 8 – 181 lbs.
  • July 15 – 175.6 lbs.
  • July 22 – 177 lbs.
  • July 29 – 181.4 lbs.
  • August 5 181.4 lbs.

I’m traveling this week, and that always makes eating well harder.  My daily goals for this week are to exercise 30 minutes, get 70 grams of protein, eat freggies, drink 100 oz. of water, and food journal, aiming for about 1400 calories.

I also need to start weight training again.  I’ve been remarkably lazy on that front, and the measurements are where that shows up the most.  I’m not going to cry (even though I kind of feel like it), and I won’t beat myself up either, because that never helps.  But now that I know exactly where I stand, I can choose to move backward, forward or frozen where I am.

Let’s start chasing the horizon.

The First Post

It’s always a little intimidating.

The first few words you post on a brand new blog.

There is always a sense of excitement, hope and possibility.  Maybe a bit of dread.  A sense of exposure.  Some pressure.

But you’re driven to do it anyway.

In this space, I plan to document my personal Happiness Project.  I was inspired after reading Gretchen Rubin’s book of the same name earlier this year.  I’ve chosen a focus area to explore for each of the next twelve months, and if you choose to follow along, this is where you can read about my successes and failures along the journey.

I’ve chosen the title “Forty-One Project” because this blog will cover my forty-first year of life and during this time I’d also like to lose 41 pounds.  I’ll talk more about the weight later, but for right now, I’d like to extend a hearty welcome to you.  I hope you’ll hang around.

Patience